{"id":12121,"date":"2022-02-16T12:42:34","date_gmt":"2022-02-16T18:42:34","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/priestessyourlife.com\/?p=12121"},"modified":"2022-02-16T12:44:32","modified_gmt":"2022-02-16T18:44:32","slug":"becoming-self-centred-full-moon-in-leo","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/priestessyourlife.com\/becoming-self-centred-full-moon-in-leo\/","title":{"rendered":"Becoming Self-Centred: Full Moon in Leo"},"content":{"rendered":"
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Last week the provincial government here announced it will do away with vax passports as of 1 March, after bringing them in the day I returned from Wilderness Solo in early September 2021. (Getting rid of masks as well, on 15 Mar.)<\/p>\n

I can feel my brain\u00a0reframing\u00a0<\/strong>my whole experience, now that there\u2019s an end date, an end point, a threshold.<\/p>\n

eg. \u201cIt was only for six months that I had to live this\u00a0story of separation<\/strong>. Six months doesn\u2019t seem that long, really. So glad I didn\u2019t sell out on myself or my values or my kids, to ease an intensity that was only there for 6 months.\u201d<\/p>\n

I feel like we all have been immersed in a\u00a0spiritual test\u00a0<\/strong>or a\u00a0spiritual opportunity<\/strong>\u00a0(which is what Life is all the time, I guess!). As as always, the requirements were different for each one of us.<\/p>\n

Somehow, in\u00a0approaching the end<\/strong>\u00a0of the test, I know already that I passed, and passed well!<\/p>\n

In writing a list of \u2018wins\u2019 and gratitudes for the week, I realised I\u2019d hit not just a weekly win but a yearly win, a\u00a0highpoint\u00a0<\/strong>that will be a standout moment of my 2021\/22 experience:<\/p>\n

I wrote: I am so excited and grateful to reach the end of this time (for now) with my\u00a0integrity intact<\/strong>!<\/p>\n

At no point did I sever off a part of myself in order to reduce the intensity of being uniquely and exceedingly Grace in this\u00a0strange and estranged world<\/strong>.<\/p>\n

And for that \u2013 for this evidence of my privilege, and my soulful effort, both \u2013 I am deeply grateful.<\/p>\n

I am\u00a0emerging on the other side<\/strong>\u00a0with greater self-knowing, deeper roots, increased power and a stronger sense of purpose and direction. Blessed be!<\/p>\n

.<\/span><\/p>\n

RECLAIMING CENTRE-STAGE<\/strong>
\nThe last six months have invited me to become more\u00a0self-centred<\/strong><\/i>.<\/p>\n

ie. To become more\u00a0centred<\/i>\u00a0in my\u00a0Self<\/i>.<\/p>\n

To become more oriented to myself and my values, warmed by my inner fire, my own actions and the power of my\u00a0soulful alignment<\/strong>\u00a0(hello, Leo<\/i>).<\/p>\n

Actually, the last six months invited me to\u00a0continue<\/i>\u00a0this work that began when I was a teenager, making sense of the faith I had inherited, and when I was becoming a mother in my early 20s, listening to the\u00a0inner promptings<\/strong>\u00a0that put me on the path of three joyous homebirths.<\/p>\n

I\u2019m musing on this word-idea \u2013\u00a0self-centred<\/i>\u00a0\u2013 because it\u2019s been arising organically at the moment, and it\u2019s one that\u2019s often\u00a0associated with the sign of Leo<\/strong>, where our Full Moon is occurring this month.<\/p>\n

Obviously it\u2019s a quality that\u2019s gotten a bad rap, at least in my upbringing. Something to obscure and minimise within myself. A quality I can easily feel triggered by when it is mirrored to me by others!<\/p>\n

It’s a quality I\u00a0project\u00a0<\/strong>onto others and\u00a0reject\u00a0<\/strong>in myself.<\/p>\n

But through my disillusioned eyes \u2013 these eyes that have had veils drawn away, seeing anew a world where so much seeks to separate us and draw us away from our distinct, unique, local, embodied wisdom and intactness \u2013 when I hold this quality of\u00a0self-centred-ness<\/i>\u00a0up to the \u2018light\u2019 of the last six months, it sings like\u00a0gospel<\/strong>.<\/p>\n

.<\/span><\/p>\n

\"\"
\nSPECTATOR OR PLAYER?<\/strong>
\nThe last two weeks I have become even more aware of the incredible draw of \u201cother people\u2019s stories<\/strong>\u201d as a distraction away from my centre, my story, my own small actions and efforts.<\/p>\n

Already, I have been totally ignoring the media for months \u2013 there is no truth I can easily discern there; the only guarantee: incredible bias and distortion.<\/p>\n

I should delete most of the feeds off my Telegram, cos I\u2019ve been ignoring them too (much bias and distortion there as well, of course!).<\/p>\n

But the visuals of people gathering in Ottawa and Canberra \u2013 the videos of truck after truck and car after car of people rolling into these places, the sense of\u00a0movement\u00a0<\/strong>and\u00a0momentum<\/strong>\u00a0and\u00a0solidarity\u00a0<\/strong>\u2013 I felt how these stories could so easily grab my imagination and dominate my attention (not that I let them, my alertness to distraction is running strong at the moment).<\/p>\n

I\u2019ve become clearer that when I\u2019m taking in someone else\u2019s words, video, insta feed, story, art or creation, at best I\u2019m a participant, but more likely, I\u2019m in the role of\u00a0spectator<\/strong>.<\/p>\n

I\u2019m not an active player on that stage.<\/p>\n

Why is it \u2013 at a time when I most need to\u00a0dream, envision and act<\/strong>, when I most need to\u00a0make art<\/strong>,\u00a0get playful<\/strong>, and\u00a0offer myself courageously<\/strong>\u00a0to my people\u00a0(hello Leo!<\/i>), in order to continue birthing the world I want for future generations of precious children \u2013 that I can so easily get distracted by what other people are doing??<\/p>\n

(I know, I know, it\u2019s human nature\u2026 Just tune in to your thoughts for a minute: are there any conversations or ideas there that you\u2019ve got running on repeat? Or perhaps there\u2019s something I\u2019ve said here that was an irritant? Maybe there was something perturbing you heard on the news? I\u2019ve got one: a tiny segment of a convo that my husband relayed to me \u2013\u00a0I wasn\u2019t even there<\/strong>! But it\u2019s going round and round in my brain, fuelled by my indignation and hijacking my creative energy! My point is, this is all a distraction! This is all someone else\u2019s story! None of this helps us do the work we are here to do!)<\/em><\/p>\n

.<\/span><\/p>\n

\"\"<\/span><\/strong><\/p>\n

SOULWORK ASSIGNMENT<\/strong>
\nThis week, I channeled all of my (active, non-spectator!) efforts into completing my soulwork assignment that is a culmination of the last six months: to write and send a\u00a0Notice of Conditional Acceptance<\/strong>\u00a0to my son\u2019s school, clarifying my position, seeking more information, and setting up a shared understanding about what we are and are not willing to do, now and in the future (cos like I said last time, I think some of these pando-vibes will be back later in the year \u2013 happy to be proved wrong about that!).<\/p>\n

If I\u2019d been scrolling Telegram, or even if I\u2019d focused on my paid work, I wouldn\u2019t have gotten it done. I was practicing\u00a0conscious neglect<\/strong>, a concept a friend shared with me years ago!<\/p>\n

I sealed and sent the NOCA yesterday to the two school principals, registered post. Ironically, it took\u00a0five months of inner spiritual growth<\/strong>\u00a0and\u00a0one week of writing<\/strong>, to get the job done.<\/p>\n

It\u2019s my Full Moon in Leo\u00a0prayer on paper<\/strong>, in action. A brand new way of speaking up for what I want and need, of being seen, of standing up for what I feel is right, for not caving in to my resignation in the face of the Machine, the System.<\/p>\n

Remember, I showed up to push an 8lb (ish) baby through my\u00a0tiny cervix\u00a0<\/strong>and out my\u00a0amazing, flexible vagina<\/strong>, without any access to\u00a0pain relief<\/strong>, not once but THREE FUCKING TIMES, and paid\u00a0thousands of dollars\u00a0<\/strong>for the privilege, just so I could\u00a0avoid dialoguing\u00a0<\/strong>with these institutions that bring up such a strong sense of disempowerment within me!<\/p>\n

I spent years and years\u00a0\u2018home-schooling\u2019 my kids<\/strong>, restricting my creativity, my career, my freedom, my time, (none of which I regret one bit, but that doesn’t mean it was always easy!) to continue this avoidance, and to keep my kids\u00a0intact\u00a0<\/strong>for as long as possible,\u00a0buffered\u00a0<\/strong>from having to acclimatise at too young an age to unyielding, uninspiring institutional ‘education.’<\/p>\n

I spent\u00a0years and years avoiding\u00a0<\/strong>and postponing this particular soulwork!<\/p>\n

So I recognised it when I saw this assignment in front on me. It had a\u00a0f<\/strong>amiliar face<\/strong>. And this time, there was no wriggling out of it, I had to speak up this time…<\/p>\n

And so\u00a0this is big<\/strong>, this prayer of words, of saying what I want and trusting\u00a0I have a right to be heard<\/strong>.<\/p>\n

And in this completion moment, I\u2019m riding a high similar to when I gave birth, the high that comes from\u00a0fronting up to something scary<\/strong>, and finding a way through it, with integrity and body intact.\u00a0Yesssssss<\/i>!<\/p>\n

.<\/span><\/p>\n

MORE JOURNAL QUESTIONS
\n<\/strong>This Leo Moon is bringing up a rich array of questions ~ here’s some:<\/p>\n